Most, if not all, women have experienced catcalling or unwanted attention at some point. Strangely, this topic is not widely covered in the spiritual community. Therefore, I had to come up with my own advice, that I now use for myself and wish to share with other women. Catcalling can shake you off balance, affect your mood, day and attitude. It is important to learn to protect our energetic field from these unwanted energies that can drain us. Claim, retain, and use your power to handle these unpleasant experiences taking the high road and protecting yourself physically and mentally.
Do not give your power away
Catcalling is the type of energy released through sexual remarks, unwanted compliments, attention, and disrespectful words. It’s the energy of lack, neediness, disempowerment, desperateness and poor self-control, among the rest. These vibes rush into our energy fields when we hear these words and sounds. It’s a challenge for those of us who are always ready to confront people when necessary, but it’s important to understand that when we react to such energies we fuel them. These needy vibes absorb our personal power. So it may seem like we are doing the right thing calling them out, but in fact we charge this negativity. I believe many catcallers enjoy these responses and attention and feel sort of empowered by it.
Being silent, leaving it unnoticed, we at minimum do not drain ourselves, do not invite negative emotions, do not choose anger, which is not a healthy feeling. We deserve to feel better than be angry. Even if it may seem like they are winning when not confronted, we actually are winning on the inside. Having a nice mood walking through the city, do not lower your frequency with an aggressive or rude remark coming out of your mouth. Protect your energy field.
Restore your vibration and mood
Even when we ignore, this negative energy is still trying to penetrate our field. Ego starts to question if there is any reasoning behind those remarks, and there can be upsetting thoughts about why people treat each other badly for no reason. Sometimes these phrases just get stuck in your head. One way of dealing with this is forgiveness. Sometimes it is just nasty comments, sometimes they get meaner when ignored, and it can turn into bullying of some sort. The truth is these people are hurting, they are lacking, they are in pain. They try to heal and choose wrong methods of doing so.
Negative energy gets defeated by the neutral or positive charge. Forgiveness is such a powerful vibration. It can restore our energy field instantly. Forgiving them does not in any way mean that it is okay what they do, but it means that we choose ourselves, our inner peace, and well-being. Choose love. You may not want anything to do with these people, but choose to forgive the hurt and lack they are projecting on you. Recognize it as pain they try to share and get out of. This pain rushes towards us, hoping we will store it. Forgive it instead.
A step further is sending them love. And yes, this may seem extreme. But love is the most powerful energy in this world, that powers up all of existence. Being able to feel love when anger is knocking on your door is a challenge, a skill that requires mastery. But we can learn. The trick is—make it less personal. It sounds like we are being asked to love the person that did us wrong, and they do not deserve it. Technically, everybody deserves love. Good news is we have more than enough within us. If we share some love and shine it onto an unpleasant situation, it will help us restore our energy field, feel lighter, and it will probably affect the ill doer as well.
This experience is sent to us as an opportunity to take the higher road, to choose to be less reactive and respond out of a place of abundance, confidence and love. Love this opportunity. Send love to this situation as it is actually a lesson. The Universe is giving you an option to elevate your consciousness through making not an easy but the right choice. When we do better, choose love and awareness, the Universe moves us one step closer to our blessings and the magical life we are all meant to experience. So actually, any interaction with a catcaller is an opportunity to receive more blessings. How great is it too see it that way?
We can be asking ourselves why they do it. But the reality is that many men are not able to and not willing to control themselves and be considerate in their interaction with another human being. It is naïve to expect everyone to be self-aware, healed and respectful enough to do what’s right, or, in this case, not do what’s wrong. Thus, as women, we have a choice. Adjust the way we look for our own comfort, safety and peace of mind, or stand our ground and keep doing whatever feels right, dealing with the consequences with our heads held up high.
I have been choosing the second option for years: “My body, my preference of how I dress it, nobody can limit my shine and dim my light.” Listening to loud music and giving at times polite and at times mean responses was my go-to strategy. Something has changed recently. I have been training a lot, my body is changing, and the attention has just reached a whole different level. This is when I noticed that me dressing the way I love and enjoy seeing myself comes at a cost of my mental state and mood.
I love walking, it’s my meditation. When it is constantly interrupted by unwanted attention, with men sometimes entering my personal space too (which is such a trigger!), this raises a question if it’s worth it. That is the dilemma: the extent to which you dress the way you feel like versus the extent to which you feel ready and willing to deal with unwanted attention.
Listen to your energy on that day. Some days I do not feel too ecstatic, so I’d rather avoid these inner battles of choosing forgiveness and love in response to rudeness. Other days I feel more energetic and am ready to handle it all like a boss. When I leave the gym, for example, I feel so powerful that all the comments just bounce right off me.
Whatever you choose do not allow it to control you. When you choose to dress down a little or put your headphones in, you do it for you, simply being aware of primitive reactions of many men and not willing to deal with them. Don’t do it out of fear. Stay beautiful, pretty, feminine, confident in your walk, keep carrying your beautiful smile and remain open to the world and your day. Spread your shoulders, keep your head up, dress the way you consciously choose and be ready to neutralize negativity in an instant with the infinite power of love flowing through you. Walk like a Queen, embody your Goddess energy and bless the world with it, choosing strength, love, and compassion.
Sending you lots of love!
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Photos: Chris Ainsworth, Rodrigo Borges de Jesus, A. L. via Unsplash